Pregnancy

 37 weeks and 4 days pregnant. This is how far along I am today with my current pregnancy. It also was how far along I was when I went to the hospital to be induced to have Lincoln. I never wrote anything down about being pregnant with Lincoln.

Pregnancy is a privilege that not all women get. I have already forgotten many things about being pregnant with Lincoln and so many things feel blurred with my pregnancy with this baby.

While there are similarities my two experiences feel very different. All I did my first pregnancy was think about being pregnant.

I spent so much time with free time. It was the middle of a pandemic. The world stopped in many ways and I researched baby items and read about what was happening to my body and my baby.

With my current pregnancy anytime anyone asked how many weeks I was I would have to pull out my phone and open an app because I never knew.

It wasn’t that I didn’t care I just had so many other things to worry about as well. I worked until 36 weeks and mothered a toddler everyday.

I didn’t realize then what a luxury I had being able to focus so much on what was happening to Lincoln and to me. It’s something I have mourned little bit this time. I just didn’t feel like I had the energy I wanted to give or the brain space.

Lincoln‘s pregnancy was not without its challenges. I got the flu during my first trimester and I have never been so sick in my life. It was a very scary experience and has made me a team flu shot person for the rest of forever.

Many appointments and decisions were made on my own due to the fact that covid 19 was so rampant and unknown. I had no idea what it would mean for my baby because no one knew that much about it. I lived in a state of anxiety.

Thomas was not able to attend the full anatomy ultrasound and I was not able to have my mom with me for my delivery. Two things I think I will always feel sad about.

It is now comical to think about the fact that I broke my leg and was on crutches during my second and third trimester. The only time I’ve ever broken a bone and it had to be pregnant. My body did not feel well because all I ever did was sit on the couch or hobble around on crutches.

The biggest challenge with Lincoln’s pregnancy was my experience with hypertension and preeclampsia. I was so swollen. I loved my doctor and her office. They did so good at monitoring me closely without causing me to feel like things were bad. I did have to collect urine in a bucket for 24 hours and carry it into the doctors office. We had to keep it in our fridge and Thomas’ study group did find it which was one of the more embarrassing moments of my life. It is something I laugh at now but I sure hated that then.

I will never forget this day being pregnant with Lincoln. Going my weekly appointment and having my blood pressure yet again be high, doing a non-stress test and them very calmly saying well it looks like it’s time to go have this baby.

With baby brother I prioritized movement so much this pregnancy. I think a big part of it has to do with the fact I couldn’t with Lincoln. I wanted to give my body its best shot at feeling good and recovering well. I needed to be stronger. I needed to be stronger both for having a baby and for being a mother. I want to be able to run, jump, crawl, dance and play with my toddler and his brother.

I’m not sure if I would have expected my gym journey to take off while pregnant but it has been an absolute game changer for me. I could so obviously tell a difference on how I felt the days I skipped my work out.

I was sicker this time and thought I was having a girl because I felt so different in the beginning than I did pregnant with Lincoln. Maybe it just had to do with the fact that I was so much busier. Movement save me.

Some symptoms were similar like heartburn and fatigue. While other things are so different. My anxiety is so much better this time. This baby is much more active gives me less room to worry.

My Varicose veins round two came back with such a vengeance. I feel like I have a sprained ankle. My legs are sore and achy. My compression socks ruined all of my outfits and take a hit at my self-confidence but not wearing them is so much worse.

I feel like I am a generally positive pregnant person. Until about two or three weeks ago and now I’m a little grumpy and just want to be done.

I am so grateful for the chance I’ve had to grow this baby but little guy you can come out now.